Wireless Internet

So, last week when I had to reload my computer, there was some fall out. 

Turns out that I copied almost all my files. But not all of them.  The folders that were on my desktop did not transfer over.  Ok, fine, I should be happy that 99% of everything was saved.  Except one of the folders was MSU.  Which is where I'm taking my grad classes.  Every single assignment I've done so far this year is gone.  G.O.N.E.  Luckiely, I've turned them all in, and didn't have to scramble to re-do one, but still. that sucks.  There were other folders on the desktop, but I can't remember which ones, so I guess they didn't have anything too terrably important. 

Another bit of fall out was our wireless router.  My father in law set it up.  My father in law sets up networks for the DoD, and is one of the head guys of network security on a military installation.  Let's just say the network in our home rivals the DoD's.  He set it up so good, that it took him almost 3 years to get his computer able to connect when he comes to visit us.   Yep.  It's pretty stinking ironclad. 

I have no freaking idea how to even begin trying to get my computer back online that way, so I scummed, and set my laptop up in the living room, with the ethernet cable connected to our cable modem straight into my computer.  It works.  But I have to sit in the living room to get on the internet, no more blogging, or facebooking from the comfort of my bed....  (and as a side note- I can't print out my coupons either, because my printer is an 'all in one' set up in the other room).

I even set up the living room differently, so that I could move my chaise lounge (which I love, but haven't sat on in forever, it never was 'part' of our set up).  I moved the love seat to the back corner of the living room, set apart from the general lay out and moved my chaise lounge up, so that I can sit in the chaise, and kick back while on my computer. 

Finally today I sat down and was determined to be able to figure it out.  Travis tried to help me the best he can, but it was interesting.  Note- your IP address is different then your MAC address, and you can't find your MAC address online (the way you can by going to whatsmyipaddress.com).  Just in case you were wondering.

Well, I'm happy to say, I did it!  I'm wireless!!! WHOOOO!  I can now blog in bed!   (and print my coupons, which is good, because they get all new ones tomorrow).  Right before Trav and I hung up, he said "I shouldn't have helped you, because before, at least you are forced to get out of bed so you can get on the computer." 

Jerk.


As a side note- my house is actually no longer a disaster area.  I opened up all the windows to let in some fresh air (which was awesome) since it was pushing 50 today.  The living room is clean as well as the kitchen, and table.  I vacuumed those rooms, and put the wreaths in their cases and put them back in the attic.  I also folded all my sweaters that were laying all over the guest bed to dry. 

Now to start my research analysis that is due in (now) less then 24 hours.

Friday's Daily Quote

That previous post got a little long, but some of you have asked what was going on, because I know that you all are in the 'step mom' roll and can relate...

On Friday, I was looking for some chap-stick in my purse... and my 'quote of the day' became:

"You know you are a grad student when you can find two highlighters, sticky tabs, paper clips, and a research journal in your purse... but not chap-stick."

Ugh... now on to that homework I've been trying SO HARD to ignore!

hmph.

I'm sitting on my couch trying to get motivated to do something.

Two of the most top priority things would be either cleaning the house or writing my research analysis paper... both seem riveting don't they!

However, the things that sound better is going out to eat (I really don't want to cook), or watching a movie, or catching up on some shows (Which- by the way- how can The Deep End on ABC already have the season finale, they only had 5 other episodes, but I do love it!).

With Travis gone, it's been a challenge.  He really does help so much around the house, and with the dogs, that I almost feel like I'm drowning when he's not here.  Plus, its really nice to cuddle on the couch when we are watching tv's, or being able to reach over and touch him if I wake up in the middle of the night.

Some girlfriends of mine came over Friday night, and we had a good night.  Laughs and Vodka are the best way to describe it! Side note- 3 Olive Cherry Vodka and Dr. Pepper, with a splash of Vanilla Vodka = bliss.  One of them thought it was very funny when she walked in my bedroom to use the bathroom (the guest bathroom has the litter box, except Hunter (our cat) of course tracks some of it out... and if you look to the top of this post- I haven't cleaned the house (but have cleaned the box!)).  Anyways- she laughed when she saw what had replaced my husband... sitting on his side of the bed was my sams-club-sized tub of animal crackers.  Oh well, you do what you gotta do.

I think that another part of the blah-ness is I feel very out of control of my world right now.   I'm not in love with my graduate classes, and so I don't truly have much motivation behind me pushing me to do homework or papers.  I have a midterm next week (I am almost excited, because that means I'm half way through with this shit.). 

Beyond being not in love with classes, the other huge stressor is my step daughter.  I've mentioned it in a couple of my past posts, and don't even really know where to start.  We left our jobs (well my job), our friends, our beautiful house for my husband to take on this more-often-then-not shitty job.  He is an Air Force Recruiter and the hours are long.  The squadron had a huge shake up about 6 months ago, and it has been confusing, unorganized, shifty since then.  He doesn't love his job all the time either.  But, we did this for her.  So we could move and be close to her.  Everything was fine the first 6 months we were here, she spent a ton of time over here, I took her to swimming lessons, we did crafty things, we baked, we painted different rooms of the house... In November she started having issues, (50% and 60% on assignments, being an absolute horror to her mother).  She never had behavior issues at our house, but at her moms she would punch, pull hair, kick, yell, throw things (busted a hole in the closet door)... did I mention she was 10!  Her mom and us talked and we decided to do family counseling.  In the weeks before and since we've been doing family counseling, I've herd her say these things about me.
* I wish they would get a divorce so that it could be Mom, Dad and me.
* I hate her.
* She is the reason I don't like going to Dad's.

Um, ok- all things that I would expect to here as a step mom... except her actions NEVER showed it! Ever.
We baked, and made cookies, we did crafts for Halloween and Christmas time, as well as beading necklaces, I have drawings on my refrigerator that says "I love Mom and Dad" with a picture of the three of us and our dogs. 

Because of all the two-side-ed-ness I decided that I wasn't truly comfortable with her coming over without her Dad not being here.  He's gone for training, he needs this 6 week class to get his next rank.

I called the counselor to tell her that I would like to speak with her before our family session.  I don't know if she didn't get the message, or what, but I basically felt like I got thrown under the bus in the session on Friday.  I was able to talk about how I felt, and not being comfortable just the two of us, and I was encouraged to continue the 'every other weekend' thing we had going on.  We have a follow up session on Tuesday, and by then, I have to come up with a list of rules and expectations we have at our house, a list of consequences, and we are all going to sign it.  I understand how it will help, but -really- do you think it's healthy to have to form a contract in order for her to come over.  I would have rather just stopped the weekends over until my husband got back, so now I feel like I'm being forced into having her over, and to be honest (I know it's immature, but it's where I'm at right now), I don't want to wake up with her in the morning, and have to cook her lunch (today my lunch was yogurt and animal crackers...) and figure out how to entertain her.  I just don't. I got my feelings hurt by her two-sided behavior, being happy and enjoying it here, and then saying she hated me, and I just don't want to have to deal with this alone.

Her mom seemed to completely understand where I was coming from, and wasn't upset at all (we almost bonded... almost).  We talked about going to go out for dinner, so she could see I didn't hate her.  We would have, except they had to be at a relative's house by 7pm, and it was a little over an hour's drive away.  I got a text message about 1/2 hour after we left, saying that she was crying. 

I'm not sure if it was because her 'game' was up, or she was truly sad that she wasn't coming over this weekend, or if (and that's a big if) she was maybe somewhat remorseful.  (I can only wish). 

So, instead of just being able to enjoy being childless the next few weeks... I'm apprehensive of what Tuesday will bring.

More Infertility/loss on TV

Ahh... all you blogging friends who watch Brothers and Sisters, it would have been nice for some warning that Rebecca looses the baby!!!

Nevertheless, she said something that really rung true.  She was baking Justin's favorite recipes, his Mom's brownies.  He came home and wanted her to be resting, and said that he would take over.  She got upset and talked about how she got imported chocolate and bought a brownie pan for it.  And then she said something I think we can all agree with...

"I've been planing this for a long time, and right now, I just really need something to work out the way I planned."

Truer words were never spoken.

*I never thought that I would be married to someone in the military

*I never thought that after I fell in love with someone in the military, we would still be in it (he had 18 months left...).

*I never thought that I would work for my parents company.

*I never thought that I would go back to teaching after working for my parents company.

*I never thought that I would truly love my Mother in Law (definite plus though!)

*I never thought that I would be married for 5 years and still not have children.

*I never thought that I would be married for 5 years and loose five babies.

*I never thought that I wouldn't be able to make my husband a father.

*I never realized that this much tragedy would make my love for my husband that much stronger.



I now know, we can get through anything...

The View

I was surprised to flip to "The View" this morning, and the topic was infertility.  They had a doctor from the NYU clinic, Giuliana and Bill Rancic, and two other couples that were dealing with infertility.

My thoughts
*Didn't know that Sherri use IVF to conceive her son
*Didn't know that Barbara had 3 miscarriages before she decided to adopt her daughter
*Awesome that Whoopie put Giuliana in her place about not wanting to gain weight after the doctor advises her to before getting pregnant.
*Giuliana said that they had done IUI, and one time they had 8 (!) follicles.... WHAT THE HELL!?! granted, they might not have been all dominate follicles, but still... my doctor threatens to cancel it if there are more then two!
*Didn't realize that you had to get permission from your spouse to have treatments... which becomes a problem if you are having a long draw out divorce.
*If you've done IVF, and have stored embryos, and go through a divorce, the courts can decide who gets the embryos....

This show is kinda hit or miss on if I enjoy it... I'm not huge fan of it overall, however this one was interesting, because fertility is not a common topic, though it seems at least two of the hosts have dealt with infertility issues.  I guess yesterday was a good lead in... they had Octo-mom on!

Virus

I have a virus, a really bad one... And not one that can be made better with DayQuil! Damn.

Trav and I had a rough weekend (dealing with him leaving, and how to deal with his daughter while he's gone). There were several other things going on, and I was happy to put this weekend to bed...
And then I got this damn virus. Its called XP Antivirus 2010. Holy Shit! Its been very frustrating, and after talking to Trav's Dad (who is close to actually being a computer god) had me do a few things and then declared 'Basterds!'. All my program files have been corrupted, so all I can't even go back and do a system restore...
He told me to transfer all my files to our external hard drive... NOW! While it is still working. I think I might be a photography whore (I'm not great, just enjoy taking pictures). That is by far my biggest file, and I have 219 minutes remaining on the file transfer. Joy.
I was hoping that today would be a good start to the week, but not so much! I downloaded more antivirus programs then I care to admit (and paid for), spent most of my day dealing with it 'scaning', and had to find research journal for a future assignent, and turn in another one. EXCEPT- the public library only let's you use the computer for 2 hours a day!! Augh! Class was long, and I just wanted to come home and drink with my girlfriend (better then coming home to an empty house and moping). Her schedule got switched, so it didn't work out.
I'm exhausted... And it's 12:31, and I'm waiting on my picture files to transfer...
This post has been filled with bitcheyness and mopeyness... but, there is a ray of light and joy in my life...
Jenicini got her first (ever) positive test this past weekend after doing a DE IVF. I'm so happy for her and her husband. I would link to her, but doing this on my blackberry, so, look her up, Trying to get knocked up by another man.

I love that my FIL can fix this, and that he only lives about 100 miles away, so I'm making the treck tomorrow,

80-10-10

That is how the stress is divided up in our household (at least on my part).

80% is due to my hellish step-daughter, and her idiot mom (I'll dedicate a venting post on this soon....)

10% is the natural stress of 'baby making', except ours delt with fertility issues.  I'm hoping that this amount goes down soon, since we are technically 'done' trying, and just waiting to save money for adoption.

10% is the normal marriage bull shit that every couple has (who's cooking, when is laundry going to be done, you know that crap).

Ugh.  I'm very frustrated, can you tell!  Hopefully one will drop out of the equation, except the one that I really want gone isn't going anywhere....

Decisions...

Thanks to everyone who weighed in on the furniture post... we ended up deciding not to get it right now, because we would have had to change the layout of our living room (which my husband was 100% against- there would be a glare on the tv).  We then looked to just get a love seat (not my favorite idea) so we could keep it the same layout as we have now.  The problem came in, the set we LOVED had a dumb love seat (double reclining +, unremovable console in the middle MAJOR --).  We found another sat that was ok... but meh... and it was like $500.00 more.  We decided we weren't going to spend even more for a set we liked less.  We will eventually get new stuff, but for now, we will just Fabreeze the shit out of it (again) and deal!  It really isn't that bad, I just complain!

We are going to family counseling with my step-daughter and her mother.  Now that we live so close, there has been major behavioral issues.  She's basically an angel at our house, and a holy terror at her moms...  so we're all trying to work through it.

That being said, she has caused 90% of the current stress in our marriage (the other 10% is either his job or fertility crap).  I decided to go into the counselor by my self to vent, bitch, get guidance, and find 'my place' in all this.  She asked me if my life was how I planned it.  I laughed out loud.  Ummm... No.  Not exactly.

I think I kinda hurt my husband's feelings when that night I asked him "Do you ever feel like there is nothing in your life the way you want it to be, besides the fact of being married to you?"   I dropped it, because I know I hurt him, but honestly, that is how I feel more often then not.

So, on to my next big decision.... what kind of birth control to go on.  We met with Dr. S today.  Trav is leaving town next week for some Air Force training.  He needs it to get his next rank.  I really wanted to spent that time trying to detox my body from all the hormones.  After that we knew we needed to do something.  Dr. S was 100% supportive of our decision to either do an IUD or Nuva Ring.  We mentioned the range of ideas we had discussed before the appointment.  With as many 'parents' as we have (his parents are divorced and we are close to both sets, and I'm adopted, but have a great relationship with my birth mom, so there are two sets on my side too) you can imagine that the advice was broad!  Our parents opinions ranged from getting our tubes tied to doing nothing at all and let nature take its course.    We didn't like either of those options (and neither did Dr. S).  So, while Trav is gone, I need to decide.... either Nuva Ring (what I was on for a couple of years before we began TTC) or an IUD.....

I hate that this is a decision I have to make.  I want to have to be deciding what new maternity top to buy.  Damn you infertility!

Furniture?

So... we are kinda going off baby budget.... and considering upgrading our furniture.  The only reason is that we have the cash (tax refund) to pay for it right now... if we don't buy it, the money will go to pay extra on my husbands truck.  That being said- here are our thoughts

We want leather, hello, with three dogs the hair is crazy, we could vacuum the furniture every day, and we would never get it all off.  It would be so nice to be able to 'dust' it off if needed.  Also, it won't hold the stinky dog smell.  Granted, our dogs are technically not allowed on the furniture, but when you house over 300 lbs of dogs- the fabric does suck up some of that smell.

We want two couches.  Really, is a love seat useful?  I guess we are blessed that we have a living room that would accommodate 2 couches.   One will have recliners, one will have a sofa sleeper (because EVENTUALLY there will be a baby in our 4th bedroom...).  Do you know how hard it is to find a model of couch that you can order two ways.... its not easy.  The sofa sleeper is also only $30.00 more then the recliner, so we figure the first time we use it, it will pay for itself.

We want them now.  The furniture we have is the stuff I bought in college.  Granted, it was nice (almost $3,000 for the 3 pieces) but it's almost 8 years old, and the cushions are a bit sad, and a psyco dog got ahold *through her cage* of the front chaise lounge, which is disguised by a pretty throw now.  We have been talking about furniture for a while (almost two years), and I'm sure this will last us a bit longer, I'm just so over it.

Is it horrible to not use that money to pay down debt (his truck), because the quicker that it is payed down, the quicker we can start the adoption process....

Now that I've rambled about the internal struggle we have had today..... here is what we are thinking about.

(times two)  They look the exact same.

Has anyone bought any type of Ashley Furniture.  How is the overall quality?

Thanks blogging friends!

Baxter's Story

We adopted Baxter, 'the baby' of the family in November of 2007.  He was one of three littermates that survived long enough to be adopted.  His Mom and three other siblings were to sick to keep fighting.  My husband and I had NO intention of getting another dog.  AT. ALL. PERIOD.  We had two (rather large) dogs, and they were girls, and we were happy.  We walked into Petco to get some more dog food, and he was in one of the first gated areas.  I fell in love.  And that is saying a lot, because I'm NOT a fan of small dogs  or boy dogs (they also said he would be close to 80 lbs, so that made it a bit better.... hes really about 55 and teeny-tiny compared to the 'girls').  We walked through the store, and came back to him to play more, and walked some more... and so we filled out an application and they were willing to do a 'trial run' because of the girls, and they had been just the two of them for almost 2 years.... needless to say, he found his forever home with us!

Every time I see this I'm shocked at how tiny he REALLY was... so skinny!  The stairs in our house were very difficult for him to navigate... it was actually quite funny!

Meeting his "sisters" for the first time

"Dad" thought it would be nice for him to 'warm-up' my side of the bed before I got in it that night... he wasn't happy when he was kicked off the bed (if you don't know- we have a 'strict' no dog's on the furniture rule)

He is more commonly known on this blog (and in real life) as our Knucklehead (or even Shithead).   You can even say "Where's my knucklehead?" and see his tail going wild under the blanket when Travis is trying to 'hide' him on the couch. 

He was my 'Valentines Day' present in 2008... which is very, very funny, because I HATE Valentines Day. 

That WAS the cat's bed... she wouldn't sleep in it after he got his yucky dog scent on it!  His one true talent is finding the absolute SOFTEST place to lay and nap, on clean laundry, on the bed, sneaking out to the couch at night, anything.  If it's soft, he's found it

We have kept in close contact with the wonderful ladies (and guys) that run the group.  They are a no-kill rescue, and have amazing hearts!

When we still lived up there, we would visit them often, and give them updated on our little boy.  When we told one of the volunteers (a newer one- they didn't know us) that we were moving, and we would let them know our new address (it's in the contract so they can 'follow up' if necessary).  She was concerned we were moving so far away and went to get Kim, the president.  Kim came over and gave us a big hug, wished us well, and said "Any puppy parent that sends us Christmas card's with the puppies picture in it we aren't worried about!"  It made us laugh.

He has STOLEN our hearts (my husband's more then mine... "He's to cute to sleep on the floor").  I have a link at the top of my blog, if you click on it, you can vote for this great organization.  It doesn't cost anything, and you DON'T have to sign up/log in at all.  You literally just search their name, (bookmark it so you can do it every day :) ) press the "Vote Now" button and type in the animal you see (their version of a captcha) and you've done it.  You can vote once a day, so please, do!  Our little boy thanks you, as well as all the other Furry Kids that they help out all the time!

Our very happy, very spoiled 'Furry Kid'

Meatloaf

I'm not a fan... never have been.  Oh well, my husband loves it, so I thought I would be a wonderful wife and pop something in the oven so that when he got home from work it would be ready.

*side-note, just figured out a week or so ago how to pre-set my oven to start at a certain time and cook for a certain amount of time! Score!!! It's awesome on the nights that I have my dumb classes (which is a whole OTHER post...)*

I found this great recipe (or so I thought) online with chopped tomatoes, onions, and bell peppers.  It even had oats in it, and then the 'topping' had brown sugar.  Brown sugar makes everything great.... right?!? 

Apparently not.  It didn't 'loaf' itself.  It was kinda crumbly, and he said it was to 'chunky'.  He asked why I didn't just use the package that was in the pantry.... and didn't understand that I was trying to be a domestic Goddess.   So, apparently I suck at picking out a good recipe (I really am not that great of a cook, though I'm trying). 

I'm trying to prepare more of our meals from scratch, partly to save money, partly to eat better, partly to become a better cook- expanding my horizons if you might. 

However, I'm SO looking forward to tonight... no cooking....and movie watching... and quiet (no snoring) sleeping... because my husband is driving to the closest base to test for his next rank!  Though, I know it will be nice to have him back the next night!

Blur

First, I want to start off by saying thank you to everyone who posted (or e-mailed) so many kind words.

This weekend was like a blur, an emotionless blur.  I think we both forced ourselves not to cry in front of the other.  You think we would be used to this... its not like this is our first time experiencing it.  I guess if all we've learned from the past is that we both grieve differently.  Though now that I think about it, I cried in the grocery store bathroom (we were in the parking lot when I got the call of my falling beta's), and I cried when I removed myself from the 'October 2010 Due Date Team on babyfit.com.  And when we told the parents... but that's it I think.  Not nearly as often as in the past. 

Except for now, we aren't talking about next time.  I don't know if that has helped our situation.  We just know that this is the final heartbreak... of this sort at least.

I spoke with my birthmother, and she said she couldn't help but feel it was partly her fault.  That her genes was causing this heart break.  I can honestly, 100% say, that thought never once crossed my mind.  Ever.  I tried to tell her she was crazy, but I know she still feels guilty.  Hopefully with time she will understand that I will never think that about her.  I will never blame her. 

If anything, I'm so amazingly grateful for the decision she made 26 years ago, because it is still blessing me (besides being alive, obviously!).  Because I was adopted, of course the topic came up with my husband and I on one of our 14 hour drives out to visit his parents (which happened TWICE, in the first 3 months we were together... I still think that because we talked almost the whole time, we were leaps ahead of most people who dated *hello-56 hours!*, and that's why we got married 7 months after we met... well, the Air Force had something to do with it too...).   The topic of adoption had come up after we were married, and we figured we would have a few children of our own, and then adopt one or two.  Seems that God's plan is for us to adopt all of our children. 

I'm so excited, last night in bed, I asked Trav, "So, now it looks like we're done trying, are we ready to move on to adoption?"  He leaned over, said yes and gave me a kiss.   I feel so incredibly blessed that my husband is 100% on board with me.

I've read countless stories of couples that are infertile, and finally have exhausted all their options (which yes, I know we didn't do IVF... there is a reason, even further proven now).  One half of the couple wants to move onto adoption, and the other side is completely against it.  A few times, they have declared that they would rather be childless then adopt.  I can see the hopelessness that those feel.  I am so incredibly blessed that my husband is ready to jump from one speeding train to another that is going in the opposite direction. 

I'm not sure we are ready for the ride, but we're jumping on now (sorta... more on that later)! 

Beta Update

What an day full of emotions... excited for the ultrasound, shear panic, some hope, and then the waiting.  I typed the last post as we were waiting for our food to come to our table after we ordered. 

We went grocery shopping, but had to take two cars.  There was something Trav had to do on his work laptop before he was 'done for the day', so I stayed in my car parked next to him waiting for him to be ready to go.

Then my clinic called.  I could tell by the sound of her voice that it wasn't good news.  I asked her what the beta number had gone up to.  She said she was so sorry, and that it had actually fell.

87.

87 wasn't what I wanted.  I wanted 2287, or I would have even settled for 2187.  But 87?  What a crappy number.

They told me to stop all my medicine, and to come back in for another beta in a week to make sure things were still going down. 

So, we will take time to heal.  Take time together.  Start saving money, and move on to adoption. 

I always figured we would have a few children of our own, and adopt one or two.  It seems that God is showing us that we are to adopt all of our children.  And I'm ok with that.  Or I will be, when I stop being mad, or sad, or whatever it is I'm feeling right now.  

more blood

All we saw was a little black dot, which of course the panic and tears started. When we saw Dr.S, he said that he was sorry, with my great betas, he was excited, and probably pulled me in there to quick. The black blob is right where it needs to be, burried deep. They took blood for another beta, and will schedule another appointment when they call me later this afternoon with the results. Trav and I are grabbing some Chinese food. The anxiety is flooding me, but I'm holding out hope that the beta is great. More later, a longer update with the beta levels.

one more hour

Can any day take any longer to pass... though now that I think about it, it is likely that every day of an ultrasound will drag.  I just want to know if my pumpkin is still doing what needs to be done!

I'm going to leave in a bit for the doctors office, it's been snowing off and on all day, so I don't know how bad the roads are.  I have noticed that several cities/towns around us have been letting the kids out early (or so it seems, as the list on the bottom of the screen keeps growing).

Just a few more prayers between now and then.   

I'll do a quick update from my blackberry after the appointment, with hopefully only good great news!

An Award, and less then 24 hours

Less then 24 hours until I know if I still have a healthy pumpkin inside of me.  Less then 24 hours until we might get to see a flicker of a heart beat (that's a big might... I'll be 5w2d, so maybe, just maybe a flicker of one).  Less then 24 hours until I can take a quick breath of relief before I start holding it until my next u/s.  Or less then 24 hours until my world is shattered....



I'm a bit behind... like almost a week but Mia, over at Salvageable gave me this one.  Thanks so much!

•Thank the person who nominated me and copy the award in my blog.  Done!

•Link to the person who nominated me.  Done!

•Share seven interesting things about myself... keep reading

•Nominate seven fellow bloggers and link to their blogs, this one is so hard to do!

Hmm..7 interesting facts about me? I'm not sure you'll think its interesting, but here it goes!



1.I'm adopted, though if you've read me for a while you know this.

2. I met and married my husband quick... really quick... we said "I Do" 7 months to-the-day after we met... blame it on the military, but I'd never change it!
3.We got married in my parents back yard, in the middle of winter!  We had a tent with sides put up, an snugged right up against the house back porch (and a huge heater).  I loved being married where I grew up.  If they ever move, the new owners have to promise that I'm allowed to come back to visit, and show our kids where we started our crazy life!
4.  I like my dogs more then most people.... and little dogs scare me!

5.  I hate, hate, hate hardwood floors... when we build our 'forever house' (after he get's out of the military) it will not have any hardwood floors... anywhere!

6.  I am bubble bath queen.  I love them, and take at least one a week.... hot hot ones, but as for now those have been put on hold (until hopefully October!), at least hot hot ones!  That is a factoring decision when we buy our houses (again military... we've bought a few!), what is the tub like in the Master Bathroom.
7.  I have the most amazing little brother.  He's kinda quirky, and we've had some fights (literally, broken nose fights...) but I would do anything for him, any time.... even if he had dreadlocks... (and hes a whiteboy!  he's way cuter with his curls!).  However, if he has children before me, I might just kick his ass!  (hes 19...)

Capital Gains

Haha!!!

I was under the disillusion that since we paid UP THE NOSE to sell our house in the Kansas City area, we would get some sort of tax break...

I wish I had a screen shot of when I did our taxes online.

"Your capital gains on the sale of this property is -$XX,XXX.oo.  You will not be taxed on the above amount."

Well thanks... you are so kind!

Gotta love a military transfer in the middle of a crappy housing market!

That was the joy of my day...

Oh, and another 2 hour nap today, bliss!  :) 

Groundhog Day

So... now that I know that I will have an ultrasound on Friday, this week seems to be dragging.  This morning, I was up bright and early (like 4:30am) to go to a Groundhog Mosey.  We have a cave just about 15 min north of where we live.  You ride in a 'wagon' towed by a Jeep.  Today, they opened the cave up to WALK through (it's the first time in 45 years that people, besides employees, could walk through).  We had some live news broadcasts, a radio station, and a breakfast that was catered in.  The owners of the cave are donating all the proceeds to our local Relay For Life event!  It was a great event, and we had a great turn out, especially since this was the first event like it!

Me being WAY to excited for being up that early.... "Jazz hands"

Well, after I came home, I snuggled into bed, and crashed.  For about 4 hours! I guess between the pregnancy and getting up early, I needed it.  Tonight is one more class... blah... can this week go any slower?!? 

As far as pregnancy symptoms, besides being exhausted, the only other thing is the twingey cramps I've been having (though drinking a lot of water helps... that won't happen when I'm teaching though!), and sore boobs... Umm... I'm ready for Friday.  That will be one more hurdle, the next thing to look forward to.  I still can't imigian actually bringing a baby home in nine months, I can't look that far ahead.  To much can happen between now and then.  All I can focus on is that so far things have been great, and we'll see what Friday brings.  I could be able to move on, and focus on my next appointment, or be absolutely devastated.


Just looked at BabyMed.com.... I didn't think this was a twin month... now I'm not so sure...

Snow *UPDATED*

***Updated***
3rd Beta just came in... 271!!! YEA!  And, *holy cow* first ultrasound this Friday!  Is this really happening?!!?


The best part about being pregnant (besides actually being pregnant)... I didn't have to help shovel snow!   Its actually a task I enjoy, or I have learned to, because I usually am the one shoveling.   This past weekend though, I got to sit inside by the 'fake' fire and watch TV, while he was out shoveling!

Last night, my heating pad broke... I don't know what happened, it just stopped warming up.  The light on the dial came on, but no heat.  My feet freeze, all.the.time. so I have it on every night before I go to bed to warm up around my feet.  I realized that it didn't work about 9pm, and there was no way that Travis was going to leave to go buy me another one.  I pulled out all the stops... but he didn't quite see the correlation between cold feet hindering me 'growing a baby'  (which was my excuse to go take a nap yesterday!). 

I also have been feeling twinges.  I know that of course I'm 'Super Aware' of everything going on down there, but I definitely feel twinges. They aren't painful, and never last for more then a second or so. Definitely not cramps. My last two (most recent) pregnancies, I don't remember this at all, which I'm thinking is a good sign because they both ended in m/c. In my mind I'm thinking its my body just getting ready to grow a baby, but not sure.  I'm waiting on my third beta result, so when the nurse calls, I will ask her what she thinks, mostly just to my my mind at rest.