Wednesday, April 6, 2011
We have expectations of our life, our spouse, our children (if we have any), our family, our friends, and on, and on, and on.
Is it better to have high expectations, and occasionally be disappointed, or low expectations, and so that things turn out better then planned?
It seems like it's a catch-22.
There are some things that have turned out better then expected.
I complain a lot (a lot- a lot) about the Air Force. We never expected that Trav would still be active duty this far into our marriage. I never thought I would be an "Air Force Wife". I can't say I love it. But it's our life, and it's treated us well. We own our home. We have everything but the truck paid off. I have the ability to stay home and be a Mom if that's what I want. There isn't much to complain about when I really think about it.
Another thing that has thrown expectations out the window is my marriage. I was young and immature when I got married. I didn't know how to be a wife. I didn't know what that meant. I was hard headed, and hurtful. Looking at our marriage then, and now, it's almost unrecognizable. And for that I'm grateful. I cannot imagine living my life without Travis in it. He is a much better man then I deserve, and he loves me so completely.
As wonderful as our life is now, the expectation that we would be a family hasn't worked out well for us so far. We tried for several years to conceive our own child, then moved on to adoption, and are now, still waiting. Yes, we've only been a 'waiting family' for 5 months with our agency... but in reality, we've been waiting for years.
I guess with the good comes the bad, and there is always bad, so I try to focus on what I can control, and to enjoy the man that comes home to me every day. And as always, he blows my expectations and gives me so much more.