Monday, July 16, 2012

Sharing with others

To piggy back off my last post- this will continue with sharing, and how I share my story.

My husband and I are willing to share our adoption journey with just about anyone who asks.  The time period before that, and what led us to adoption isn't shared as often.  The only reason for keeping it more private is because of how emotionally exhausting it is.  Reliving our miscarriages, testing, surgery, and fertility treatments take's us back to a few very, very hard years.

A few weeks ago, one of Trav's co workers was talking to him about the adoption (he needed info from her department about how to get the DOD adoption credit).  She and her husband are getting ready to start treatments, and since Trav didn't know all the details of what I did, he got her cell phone number, and told her that I'd call.  It seemed that every time I thought about it, I knew she was either at work, or it was late in the evening, after Isaac went to bed.

Last week, I finally had the opportunity to call and talk with her.  We had a great conversation, that lasted over an hour.  It went over every aspect of my diagnosis, treatment, side affects of fertility drugs (they have done a cycle since Trav talked with her), surgeries, and then onto our process of adoption.  Being a military family, I told her of some of the issues that we had to overcome, so that she could be aware of that too.

It was a great conversation, I'm so glad that we were able to talk with each other.  However, at the end of it I was emotionally exhausted.  Re-living all the pain took more effort then I thought it would be.  I think back to the times we were trudging through it, and I'm surprised how much we did actually go through.  Who would have thought I could survive 8 miscarriages, that our marriage could survive it?

But, it did.  We survived, and we're living our happily ever after.

With a knucklehead little boy.


  1. It sure does stir up a lot of emotions talking about our path to baby. I am grateful to my sister for giving me her eggs but sometimes I wish it would all just go away. I wonder if it is similar in adoption. Do you sometimes just wish you could pretend that you didn't have to remember the process. I know that the process led to the best outcome in the world but it doesn't mean we want to remember every little detail. It isn't that I am embarassed I just don't want to go to that place. Anyways, I completely understand!

  2. I'm glad you were able to help someone else. :) Your little knucklehead boy doesn't make everything in the past go away, but he sure does make it easier to enjoy your days now. Love you!

  3. Sometimes I find rehashing our journey hard because I know the person asking for advice and wanting to know what they are in for is still viewing it through rose colored glasses. I know it's pessimistic but even 1 cycle does such irreparable damage to a person's psyche that I know the person asking has no idea how tough it will be if it ends in failure.
    IF, the gift that keeps on giving....

  4. I am so happy that you showed everyone your journey! It is hard work to do...but honestly, if I do adopt in the future, girl you are who I will be coming to! Thank you for being so open and honest with us!!

  5. Just wanted to say hello! I have been reading your blog for a while now. My little boy is also named Isaac. :) Hope all is well!