Wednesday, September 21, 2011

First Letter

A few weeks ago, we had to send our first letter to Isaac's birthparents.  It seemed like such a daunting task.  I wasn't really sure what to say.  Or how to start, or what not to say.  Our agency included a example, topics, and a few adoption articles to help us with this first letter. 

I read them all, and then sat on it.  For a few days. 

I sat at my computer and started to write.  And I wrote, and wrote.  They suggested 3-5 pages, on 'nice' paper.  All I could come up with for 'nice' paper was the paper we printed resumes out on, so that's what they got.  We had to do two letters (they could be the same) but addressed to his birth father and birth mother.  And had to send in duplicate set's of photos.

I told them about the time we spend in Kentucky, what we did while we were there, the trip home, our routine, and other things that had happened, like the baby shower friends held for me.   He was able to meet all his Grandparents within a week of each other, so we sent photos of them each holding him, told about his room and routine.  We wrote of how much he has changed our lives, and brought a whole new level of joy to our family/marriage/lives.

And then we sent it off.

His birth parents requested a semi-open adoption, even though we were willing to have an open one.  I hope that they write back to us (and said that in the letter).  I also included an 'adoption contact specific' email address for them to email to us if they would like to.

Being adopted myself, I didn't have much information on my birth parents.  My first few months of contact with my birth mom was all about questions.  Who she was, why she placed, what other family I have...

I don't want that for Isaac.  I want him to know how loved his is by both of them.  I want him to know where he gets his gorgeous brown curly hair.  I want him to know them.  I want him to love them, just like we already love them. 

I hope they respond.  I hope they write back.  For him.  For us. 


  1. I'm sure you blessed them tremendously with an update on your sweet son. And what a blessing for them, Isaac, and you that you guys are willing to be so open with them.


  2. I'm so glad you were able to get out in writing what they probably were wondering. I hope you hear from them. Thinking of you all!

  3. I'm sure they are going to appreciate those letters and the pics more than you'll ever know!!!

  4. Just wondering how you're doing...

  5. OPen adoption is sometimes so complicated for everyone involved, but it is also such a gift for us all, too. Hopefully for all of you, your little guy's birth parents will want more openness as time goes on.