Remembering

I am one in four.

Though right now I just put my son down for his morning nap, we struggled for many years to have a family.

As he sleeps right now, I'm crying remembering the little ones that I have in heaven.

Eight of them.

Some boys and some girls, I'm sure.

I'll never be able to hold them here in my arms, but they will be waiting for me.


Loosing them has hurt more then I can explain, and is something I would never wish on anyone.

But because of the loss, I've made some of the best friends.  Some that are far away, and some that live close.  There is a special bond that I have with others.  We both know the pain.  We can both cry for each other.

We both know how bad it sucks when you have to continue with your life, or the events you have planed, knowing that each twinge is your body failing you.  I hate that I (and others) know just how to 'suck it up' because we've been there before...

So, for my friend in Florida, who lost her first just a while ago, or my friends down the street who have lost as many as Trav and I.  I think of you.  Today I'm remembering your angles, as I remember mine too.