One Year Ago

A year ago, we were heartbroken.

A year ago, all seemed lost.

A year ago, we didn't know how we'd go on.

A year ago, we sat in each other's arms and cried.

A year ago, our match failed.  After we had been there when he was born, spent the whole night with him, went back the next day.  After we were completely in love.

It was a really shitty way to spend New Year's Eve.  And an even worse way to start 2011.

If only I'd known then that a year later, I would be holding on to him, maybe it wouldn't have hurt so bad.

Or would it?

How It's Changed

Where I used to lounge and take bubble baths while reading a book and sipping a drink

There is now a babies bath tub sitting.

Right outside the shower, where I would spend a long time under the hot water

is a bouncer, where my little man can sit while I rush through my shower.

On the counter where we used to make our dinner,  (and pour my wine!)

Is now a baby bottle tree

Our kitchen table that used to never be used

is where we now where we get our son ready for his outings.

The fireplace that we would turn on and cuddle on the couch

Now has a swing in front of it.

Our entryway nook

now houses an exersaucer.

It's amazing when I look around our house, to know that 6 months ago, none of this was here.  Our house, our arms, and our hearts were empty.

Looking around now, there is evidence of Isaac every where.  

And that makes my heart happy.

Vacation Time

I'm on vacation, (and have been for several days) so I'm limiting my computer time, but I did want to drop in and ask all of you to go send some love.

When we had our failed adoption, my readers were amazing!  You lifted Travis and I up in prayer, said many kind things, came back to check on us, and you loved us as we grieved.

So I'm asking, will you please do that again!  A failed match isn't easy ever, but it especially sucks during the holidays.  I know, ours failed on December 31st... what a way to ring in this year!


Please go over to Being Joyful Always and flood her with the same support that you gave me.  She needs the love, hugs, and prayers.

Snow!

Ok, not much snow, but it snowed here...

I tried to take Isaac out in it.  I knew we had gotten a snow suit thing in some of the hand me downs, but it's 0-3 months, and though he still wears 0-3 months in 90% of his clothes, this did.not.fit.

So, what else is a Mom to do but take a picture on snowflake fabric?!?

Trav ran by on the way home and got a snow suit that fits him, so we'll be ready for our next snow!

An Award

I REALLY suck when people give me awards, I always mean to go do the fun conversation part of it, but alas, I don't.  So now, I just read the comment... and I'm doing it!!

I'm not sure if you read Michelle @ Greetings From Nowhere, New Mexico.  Besides the obvious fact that she's awesome because she's from New Mexico (where I grew up).  She's a fun gal who is currently taking a short break before they dive back into fertility treatments next year.  She has always been so kind and supportive, and I love reading her blog.

1. Thank the person who awarded you.
2. List 7 things people may not know about you.
3. Pass it on to 15 (Holy Crap!) other bloggers and don't forget to notify them.

So... for seven things.


1.  Today was my very first day working since we got Isaac.  I might have cried a bit after I dropped him off, but once I got there, actually had fun.  I subbed for a class that I know well, I had about 1/2 the students for 9 weeks last year during a long term sub position.  The were a great class to 'get my feet wet' again.


2.  Marshmallows are my downfall.  I can eat a whole bag while watching an hour tv show... and have done it several times!


3.  I'm not really sure how it's going to impact Isaac's story of adoption, but I think I have a pretty unique view of adoption, because I'm adopted, and now am an adoptive mother.  I thought it was interesting as we went through the process the oponions/comments that my Mom and my birth mom had.  It was kinda funny!


4.  I HATE not being organized for Christmas (like knowing what gifts to get everyone/where to buy them/when we're delivering them...).  Guess what... this year seems like total chaos!


5.  My little brother is about as opposite as can be, but we have this funky bond that even our parents don't understand.  We can not talk for weeks, and then he calls me, estatic, about a grade he got on an Art History paper (92%!! Way to go Ben!). He's 7 years younger then me and a foot taller. 


6.  If I hadn't married my husband, he would have been my biggest regret.  Luckily, we fell in love, got married, and have lived happily ever after.  I'm blessed to celebrate seven years with him next week!   


7.  My husband had benefited greatly from my pinterest obsession... he's never had more home cooked meals. Granted, some of the pins get 'deleated' right after I make them... but I'm trying new things, and for the first time, am sorta enjoying it.


I'm supposed to tag 15 people, but I suck at that part too, so if YOU wanna have some fun and do this too, consider yourself tagged... annnddd GO!

First Snow

We had our first 'dusting' of snow, but that was enough to break out the snowflake fabric and take some pictures!!!

I got a new camera for Christmas from my parents.  Well, really it's "our" camera, because my parents combined  our anniversary present, his Christmas present, and my Christmas present.  Did I say it was a really nice camera.

I've had it since Black Friday, and have taken almost 800 pictures.... my computer is filling back up, I'm going to have to transfer all the 2009 pictures to our external hard drive soon!